It's a small blizzard outside. I say small because on my weatherbug, in animated mode, shows that this storm shall pass soon. Somedays weatherbug is on crack and I hope today is not one of those days.
I am having Christmas with my sister today. We live 10 miles apart...how sad is that? We had one party canceled because of a death in the family on her childrens fathers side. Did that make sense? My house is a wreck and now my road is also a wreck. Thank god sis loves me.
I have gotten several comments on my old blog that I am letting my mom win. She doesn't win. In fact this will drive her (more) insane. She hates it when she is not in the middle of everyone's business...which makes me a happy girl lol. Hey I tried to make it work and now I am tired after my 43 year lonnng fight with an insane woman that thinks she has the right to call herself a mom. I have been worrying myself sick over the fact that I do share the same gene's as her, well at least half of them. Am I going to go crazy? Somedays I can feel the crazy sneeking in around the edges of my brain. Or is that just life sneeking in? I get really confused somedays as to whether I am going insane or is the worrying and thinking about it making me insane??? I do believe that it is the thought of being like her when I am in my 60's that makes me insane. I have 20 years to think about that one and you poor souls will have to endure with me:)
Princess Ditto
7 comments:
You are not like her and I'll tell you why. Because she was the way she is from the start. You talked about how she was during your childhood.....she hasn't changed. You have a husband, happy children, a farm with animals you love and you've run a business. I don't think your mom could have accomplished all of that in her state of mind. If you ever think you are losing your mind its because you are a busy woman with responsibilities..... You have accomplished a lot and overcome even more. And you love animals...and that,my friend,says a lot about a person to me. Only kind souls love our 4 legged friends.
Try not to let her get to you--my mom is kind of the same way--lots of drama and always wanting to be in the "power seat." I have gotten better about not letting it get to me as I've gotten older!
I agree that you're unlike your mother. I see lots of selfless behavior with your kids and the joy you have with your animals... I've yet to hear of selfless behavior from your mother, you always describe her as selfish.
And the fact that you worry about being like her is normal. I worried about being like mine. The trick is to look at how people respond to you. Some people inspire joy and other's bring misery. I think you're pretty joyful!
Hugs!
If it makes you feel any better, I'm 56 and still not like my mother, the Brown Recluse. Just the fact that you're worried about it shows it will likely never come to be. You have a great sense of humor, you're a great mom, and your family loves you. Blow it off!
This is really cool!
All you can do is try to stay on top of what you feel is your "crazy sneaking in". I don't think you will be like her, but what do I know?
I'm just glad I found you again. (*sniffle)
cant wait to see what you come up with for this here blog...there are NO winners OR loosers in a family fight/disagreement/etc...I am glad you have done what you feel you needed to do and I support you...always....
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